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Shouldn't have attended the dinner yesterday... or should I say a gathering of all the so-called relatives of mine ... A dinner that I was forced to attend. During the dinner, someone mentioned about something I "did wrong". Till this morning, I was questioned about it. I did not do it but why no one believe me ... I can't control what other people want to say about me .... they can say anything ... but why my own family don't believe me??? They always say that if I behave and not doing anything wrong, there is no reason other people will say anything about me ... But what does it mean? Does it mean to always do what they and other people expect me to do??? Why can't I just do what I want? Why can't I have a say about my own life?

Since I can remember, whatever I do is considered wrong, whatever I say is wrong, ...etc. Each time something goes wrong, the blame goes to me. Unless I stop arguing and insisting that it is not my fault, no one will let it go. If I keep arguing and insisting that it is not my fault ... no one in the family will bother to even talk to me at all. How long will this keep going? As long as I live???